Evil Elevator

So, I'm not a fan of elevators. When I was little, my dad used to "bounce" the elevator as it climbed; I was convinced it would plummet. Since then, I've never been fond of the whole holding-box-attached-to-a-cable-that-could-snap-at-any-moment-and-drop-you-to-your-death thing.

As you get older, I realized there is another elevator feature every single and/or virgin must fear: elevator music. Why? Because the day you choose to ride in an elevator will be the day it chooses to play a sappy version of All By Myself while you are trapped inside its inescapable metal hell. 

Yeah.  Ain't it great?

Note to self: Avoid evil elevators; take stairs--get exercise, no horrid hate music, no snap-capable-cable.