My Ovaries Are Deadly Weapons...Apparently.

Wake-up: Huh? Is it already morning? Given the sun in my eyes, I'm assuming it is. Ick. Bad night. Little sleep. Crap dreams: Death Eaters (yes, of the Harry Potter variety) were after me; I didn't have a wand, so I threatened to smite them with my ovaries. Indeed. I told them my ovaries "...bite and are pissed at still being there, alone, unfertilized." I was saying this while flying backwards on a broom.

Truly, deeply troubling.

What's more troubling is how I intended to "smite" them with said ovaries.  Cringe. Mustn't think on it.

Should have known this would be a rough one from the second my toes touched the floor. Been moving furniture about my room--not an easy task when single, but I was determined. Moved my desk out and over about 1/2 inch. My newly painted big toe naturally found it. Hurt like hell. Chipped nail, very red, and, ah, of course it would start swelling a bit. Terrific. Now have Quasimodo toe.

Shower: While shaving, my razor apparently needed to shave my left middle fingernail. Fantastic. Now have strangely misshapen fingernail in manner of Phantom of the Opera's mask.

Quasimodo toe and Phantom bird finger. There are no words.

Lunch: No soda. Excellent. Replaced with water...boring, but healthy. Grilled chicken Caesar salad...and chocolate covered Christmas cookies.

Afternoon: Hmm, interesting news. According to Mutual Acquaintance, Mr. Bo Tangles is a little annoyed I didn't give in. In fact, according to Mutual Acquaintance, he said, "I couldn't get in."  Ewwy. Am now an inanimate object...like a car with the keys locked inside. Yes, just the kind of man I'm looking for! Right.

Evening: Must wrap presents. Seriously. I love doing the bows, but the actual wrapping-paper-part is so not my thing.

My Dallas Mavericks are making me nervous...PLEASE WIN!!!!! OH GOD HELP ME...MARION MISSED A FREE THROW!!!!!

19.4 seconds remaining...12.9 seconds...Dirk makes his free throws...6.9 seconds...5.9...Dirk made his shots...OVER! MAVS WIN!!!! Great game!!! 'Nother tough road game coming up.

Phew.

Overall, the most intriguing part of my day was recalling my dream--me, on a broom, locked and loaded with my smite-able ovaries. Maybe I could be a new superhero...Ovary Girl! Maybe not.